Three mice are sat in a pub having a few pints and they're discussing which one is the hardest.
The first mouse says, "I'm the hardest. I go up to mousetraps, rip out the cheese and, as the bar comes down, I benchpress it 30 times and throw it across the floor."
The second mouse replies, "You nonce! I get the rat poison, crush it into powder and snort it!"
The third mouse shrugs his shoulders, downs his pint and walks to the door.
"Where you going?" ask the other two.
"I'm off home to fuck the cat!"